Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Randomize
