Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
