I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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