he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
