whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
