So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Randomize
