i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I don't think brook has ever known best
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Randomize
