At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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