ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
