let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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