so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
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