Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
