Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
