Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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