Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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