So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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