NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
