btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I'm sobbing to NWA
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
