Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
He better not be in your backpack
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize