Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
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