i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I am full of burrito and curiosity
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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