Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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