i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize