Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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