Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Sorry about my life...
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
