No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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