I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize