I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Jerry, you need to find god
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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