Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
another moral hangover. fuck.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize