Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Farmville is her only friend.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
