The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize