You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
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