that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i just google imaged poop.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
