Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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