dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
jump out the window naked night went bad
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