Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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