I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
