physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
