apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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