That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
