i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
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