I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
it was like eating out sand paper
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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