you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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