i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
