1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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