And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize