I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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