Fuck appropriateness.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize