I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Randomize
