Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Are we still banned from the library?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
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